I started writing the night my brother died. Not because I had a plan, or because I thought it would become anything. I just didn’t know where else to put everything that was happening in my head. So I wrote to him. I’m a neurodiverse writer, which basically means my brain doesn’t switch off neatly. It notices details that feel too small to explain but too big to ignore. When Sam died, that got louder.
Sam lived with a rare condition, so our life was never typical. It was hospitals, routines, adaptations, and mostly a lot of humour. But it was normal life for us. Being his sibling shaped everything, and after he died, I had lost the centre of my universe. I was completely lost, trying to fill this Sam-shaped void.
Writing became that place. What I was writing wasn’t structured. It wasn’t good writing as such. It was honest. Brother to brother. Over time, those entries became a book: I’m on a Journey to See You, Sam. It’s not a guide or a polished story. It’s just a real account of what it’s like to lose a sibling- especially when your life has already been shaped by disability, care, and complexity.
I’m sharing it because sibling stories matter. Especially the messy ones. The ones that don’t fit into a neat little version of grief.
If that resonates with you, you can find more of my writing and the book here:
https://www.jackwaddington.co.uk/
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Im-Journey-See-You-Sam/dp/1919440445
Jack Waddington
Jack Waddington is a London-based writer, practising artist, and secondary school art teacher. His debut memoir, I’m on a Journey to See You, Sam, began as diary entries written in the days and months after the death of his younger brother, who lived with Duchenne muscular dystrophy.
Alongside writing, Jack creates drawings and paintings and designed the book’s cover artwork himself. He lives in London with his wife, where he continues to write, teach art, and make work exploring memory, grief, and the complicated ways people remain present in our lives after they are gone.